The Hipster Mom

Woe! Holy Cute Hipster Family

So, I saw that this other cool mommy blogger added me to her blog roll. Blogger etiquette says if you like what you see add them to yours. Check. So here we are, tonight, a few weeks after the add and I'm moseying around my page and decide to check out what she's up to. So, not only do I come to find she's keeping up a cute blog but her HUSBAND has a frigging cool daddy blog! Um, Hi, Vaughn's Mama, your hubby is kinda the shit. Not that mine isn't but he pretty much worships you and says it in writing! You guys are redic cute! Congrats to the 3 of you...your one cute Hipster Fam...I don't care if you don't like that word...cause you are! BTW coming soon, "What exactly is the definition of a "Hipster" mom?" All this and more on the next episode of Soap...I mean The Hipster Mom. 

The Hipster Mom Say's Try This!: Tag Your Food

This actually would have helped me tremendously before I was a mom but I wasn't that resourceful then. This is easy and will save you a bunch of time guessing whether or not your going to poison your kid, your family and yourself. 

Tip: Keep a Sharpie handy in the kitch (On a window sill or even tied to a magnet on the fridge) and always mark the things you open with the date. Duh! It's not rocket science but just trying to make each day a little easier and run just a little more smoothly. Let's call it cutting down on the chaos. Think smarter, not harder people!

Fritz Fashion Icon!

Fritz was featured on Highsnobette this week! 

The Inheritance

There are things you want your kid to inherit like your ability to draw or your keen business sense. Then there are the things you are down right nervous about him inheriting like your indulgence of 2, sometimes plus, drinks a day, your ridiculous cookie habit, shopping addiction or even your more pharmacological escapades on a nighttime rager. I witnessed something tonight that gave me a little twinge that maybe, possibly Fritz has inherited my somewhat addictive behavior or I could be paranoid ? Let me tell you what happened...There is a tub of lollipops in the cupboard, organic of course, but lollies all the same. Essentially, baby crack. I have a feeling the nanny may have let him have one maybe two today because about a half hour after I got home he was hanging off the kitchen counter grabbing for the cupboard like a crack fieeeeend.

A PSA: Love Overload!

Sometimes this world breaks my heart in two. Not in a bad way though. More like a heartache at how frightening the world can be and how precious what we have actually is. Sometimes, when I am alone, I reflect on my son, my husband, family and life in general and it will make me so immensely happy I will want to cry. But other times, I get so immensely scared I want to cry. I think the reason is, is that when you have a child to care for, a husband to hold on to for the rest of your life and a family to love and maintain you have everything to lose and you can't help but have this flash in front of your eyes now and then. 

Super WTF Toddler Shopping Addiction Edition!!!!

 

Ok, I'm only commenting on this because it's so bad it's good. Or is it? I'm really confused. Number one the heels are all jenkey and twist beneath the baby's foot. I would only put a proper stiletto on my child preferably a Giuseppe Zanotti or Chanel pump. Number two, this is why I'm glad I have a boy...so no one buys my crapola like this. Number 3, these women are obvi making $$$ on this, so kinda can't hate. Over all this is the wackness but that baby girl trying to walk in them is kinda funny. 

The Hipster Mom Say's Try This!

Sometimes there are things that I want to tell Fritz right now that he really doesn't give a shit about. Things like "Look kid, ya gotta fake it till' you make it" or that he neeeeeds to see Fast Times at Ridgemont High and For a Few Dollars More. So I developed a sort of advice/list book for him. This is very simple and requires no "scrapping", glueing or cutting. All you need is a journal of some kind and a pen. I say be loose with it. There's no rules to what can be written in it. But here are some of the things that I've been writing in my book to Fritz: 

Letters: These are mostly about how much I love him or what he is doing at that very moment I'm writing the letter. Dear Fritz,....Right now your smashing the remote into your head at full force and saying "Owwwch". You have no idea how much I love your little punkin butt..ect.

Movies: I love amazing and odd ball B movies and hopefully one day fritz will take my advice and see all these cool movies I know about. I think its important that he sees things like: Return Of The Alien Deadly Spawn, Toxic Avenger and anything Troma, All the Sleepaway Camp's, Wet Hot American Summer, FrankenHooker, Dirty Harry, Style Wars and Breakin'.

New! The Hipster Mom Webisodes

Danger!

I don't know what other parents do but as soon as Fritz could move around at all and touch anything I adopted using the word Danger...for well...Danger."No" is boring and wayyyy over used. I thought I'd use something with a little more punch, a little more impact. I also try to say it a lot like Mystikal does..."DANE-JAH! Watch ya Self! Show Me Whatcha Workin With!!". Except I just say the "DANE-JAH" part. My friends think it's funny and it kinda works. So it goes something like this: Fritz tries to stick his hand in the open flame on the stove. Me: DANGER!. Fritz begins to get tangled up in the million Mac cords hanging off my desk. ME: DANGER!. Fritz starts to scale the bookcase with 5,000 lbs of books and sharp picture frames on it. Me: DANGER! You get the idea. To wrap this up tho, I hope I'm not damaging him because maybe there are times I misuse Danger...like when he grabs the dirty skank toilet brush and starts flinging it about or taking DVD's out of their cases??? Don't scratch mommy's Sopranos Season 3. DANGER!!! 

Fritz Got Game!

Today I unselfishly did not by myself Jordan's and instead hooked up little Fritzy. Ok fine they didn't have my size! But for serious they had soooo many cute little kicks I wanted them all! But I was especially bummed that they didn't have these New Balances in his size. Which is an 8! by the way...huge for an 18 month old. Oh great...I guess he's gonna be uh, ahem, "well endowed".